A Little Love Letter
To my darling support system,
As Europe so brilliantly put it, “It’s the final countdown.” If you’re a little behind the group, the seedling of an idea to travel the world hit warp speed and is now a reality. The final stages of making real have all been hit, and now I am resting on a very precarious ledge between utter fear and panic, and unadulterated excitement for all that the future may bring. It’s been a moment to moment struggle where my brain transitions with lightening speed between crying, screaming and running away, shutting down completely to the dulcet tones of Gilmore Girls, and invariably to my deep-seated desire to roam and explore at this exact moment.
And this is where you, my friends and family, have come into play. There is only so much I can do solo. I can do all the actual work, run around the city sourcing last minute items, get my vaccinations, organize my world and life, and spend all my money like a champ. I can also procrastinate, research and daydream like it’s my job. What I can’t do is give myself an outsider’s perspective. I can’t shine light and reason into the dark madness that are my daily freak outs. I can’t reach in and pull myself out when I fall into a pit of self doubt about the validity of my plans. I also most definitely cannot comfort and reason myself out of the feeling like I’m failing myself and everyone I’ve spoken to when I realize that I can’t afford to do everything I would like to do.
For the invaluable services that my support system have provided, and will undoubtedly continue to provide, I am without words in my gratitude (and for those of you who really know me, you know I’m not often at a loss for words). If you aren’t sure if you’re included in this group, just think to yourself if you’ve patiently listened as I’ve spoken about my trip ad nauseam and had full discussions with myself, if you’ve handled my scattered thought processes and insane number of lists with aplomb, and if you’ve gracefully accepted the physical mess my research, packing and distress has become, then you can safely call yourself one of my support system. If it hasn’t seemed like I’ve heard or taken your input into account, rest assured I have heard every bit of cautionary advice you have given. As a highly indecisive and slightly neurotic person, I couldn’t have appreciated those who helped quell my mind and make big and small decision as much as they could possibly deserve.
And with that I close out this love letter to my support system. Though this letter has come to an end, my gratitude for your continued support does not.
T-minus 2 weeks until departure. Excuse me while I make some more frantic lists.
